Belonging Elsewhere

My latest trip to Europe reinforced the fact in my mind that I might really fit in better somewhere else. Specifically, Spain or France (probably Spain, though). I went to Ken's this morning, and it always reminds me of Europe, so that's what brought all this on.
So here are the following reasons why I would probably do better in one of those countries:

• It's beautiful and ancient (duh).
• Shorter work week--less of the work work work until you vomit mentality that is so common here. Yes, I know that France recently repealed the maximum 35 hour work week, but people aren't necessarily happy about it.
• The average European gets approximately six weeks of vacation a year.
• Healthy lifestyle: compact cities, excellent mass transit, lots of walking, better relationship with food.
• I look more like someone from southern Europe than a pasty Portlander--the Spanish assumed I was French, the French assumed I was from Spain. Either works just fine for me.
• Lots of people in both Spain and France knew what my necklace meant. NO ONE in Portland did. Culturally ignorant Americans!
• Being intellectual is good there, whereas in the U.S., the general concensus is that anyone educated or intellectual is an "elitist" (what's wrong with that, by the way?), or a snob of some sort.
• Both the Spanish and French are, on average, fricken hot: olive skin, dark hair, normal weight...and guys there actually find me attractive! Amazing! No one here does. Portland sucks.
• National healthcare!!!!!
• Happy, active, non-reclusive elderly.
• Afternoon siesta [in Spain and Italy]. I could really use that.

Now all I need to do is learn the languages. Yes, I know how to speak German, but Germany's mentality is much more anal-retentive and work-driven. Also, people there are too tall.

Well, I guess now I need to get back to work work work until I vomit. Sleep? I don't need sleep. I haven't gotten much sleep in the last 4 weeks, which is why I'm in such a wonderful mood lately. Grr.